Lonely…

I am so unbelievably lonely. It’s like I feel empty.. And no one gets that. My friends tell me to move on I am better off without him. I agree, I am better off without him. However, I am so unbelievably lonely! How can I be this lonely? Gosh, I just want to cry. No one can fill the void of losing a piece of yourself. That’s what I feel like I have lost – a piece of ME – a piece of who I am. In a relationship, you give yourself away. Then you just keep on giving. For 14 years, I have been giving myself away. 14 years. That’s nearly half my life. Half my life has been thrown away on two men that do not love me – I don’t believe that they ever loved me. Both of those men, at one point, were my life. Had all of me, all of my love. And both of them tossed me aside. Yet, I am supposed to believe that I am worth something? I am supposed to believe that I am loveable? How can I feel like that? How can I not feel like a hideous monster? I am so unloveable. And it is my own fault why I am so lonely. I can’t deal… I give up… 

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