Just One of Those Days…

Ever have a day where you wake up and just know it’s going to be a rough day? This was me. Yesterday. I made a decision. Probably a bad decision. I think I had a lapse in judgment, just kind of doubting God? Worried about timing? I don’t really know… His will, right?

I can’t see the forest for all the trees…

Today, it feels like everything is coming against me. On Sunday, in the pre-service huddle, Pastor said something: 35% of people will always like you, no matter what you do or don’t do. 35% of people will always dislike you, no matter what you do or don’t do. Your true “approval” rating lies in that last 30% – that’s what tells you how people really feel about you – or how you are really doing? They judge you based of your character, the facts, the circumstances, the situation, etc… Luke 6:26 gives a warning for if everyone should *gasp* like you: “Woe unto you, when all men shall speak well of you! for so did their fathers to the false prophets.” Now this isn’t my issue… On the contrary! My issue is the fact that I am just hated! I’m like, “Where are my 35% supporters?!” Do I bring it upon myself? Feels that way sometimes… Not even on purpose.

Per true form when everything else is coming against me, who has to jump on board? The children’s father. That want-to-be arrogant jerk. The only way he can ever push my buttons is to try to manipulate me via the kids, then blame me for “putting the kids in the middle.” I decided not to accept it. I let him know just how controlling, and manipulative, and toxic he is. I let him know that the lesson he is teaching his daughter that love means a man mistreats her, as he ignores her, yells at her, and she hears from her stepsister that he said he didn’t want her to come to dinner.. Why? Because you are angry with me? And I told him do not take your anger for me out on her.

Then the Lord convicted me. Why, God, why? My stupid job has this Philosophy of Care Statement (which I helped coin) that involves the phrase: People do well if they can. Perhaps he is truly doing the best he can. Perhaps, given the man he has always been, he will never be a better man, or father. However, herein lies my sin: I have the Holy Ghost. I AM saved. To be a true Christian is to be a true reflection of God. That is to extend forgiveness and grace. He said to forgive 70*7, and that is just in one day, and when the offender reached that 491st time in a day, you start all over! I have told him multiple times that he disrespects me, and asks one thing of me but does the opposite. Whether it is a willful disrespect, or he is truly lagging in a skill, because he is doing the best he can – I am the Christian. I am the one with Christ living inside of me. Yes, it’s annoying! Yes, I am tired of being persecuted, and accused of dumb crap. But God told me to make it right, because I have something he doesn’t. This Christian life is hard. I don’t like being the bigger person all the time. But that’s the way it is..

“He never promised that the cross would not get heavy, and the hills would not be hard to climb.

He never promised victory without fighting, but He said help would always come in time.”

Wasn’t Jesus the ultimate example?! As He lay dying, nailed to the cross, He prayed, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” People do well if they can… We can’t fault them when they don’t know better. No, we don’t have to subject ourselves to ridicule, hurt, and pain, however some sure like to exercise that 70 * 7 forgiveness thing…

2 Comments

  1. I’m so blessed by this one today! I needed this! I’m apart of your 35% and I hope you never forget it! One thing I’ve learned, every time my children’s “father” (using that term extremely lightly here) comes against me, I start looking for what God is about to do. See I’ve learned the devil’s tricks and he was always the one to get lobbed at me to take my focus. When the ex shows up, God is next…at least in my circumstances. My ex is the devil’s last feeble attempt to steal my focus and whatever is about to come next. It used to throw me ALL THE WAY off my game. I’d sit, shaking, weakened, angry, pissed off, ready to burn the world down, and almost miss what God was doing. When I would see it, I’d laugh and be like, why did I let that idiot, or those idiots bother me?! But learn to see the signs. It’s what comes next that’ll show you why the attack was so intense. You’ll start to learn, oh ok…God is doing something. I see you satan. Not today! 😀
    Love you!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, and I know you are apart of my 35% supporting crew 😊 I like that phrase: “When the ex shows up, God is next.” Rings true for me. Glad this one blessed you today!

      Like

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