I can truly say that I am blessed. I remember crying out to God, a year or two ago, in one of the loneliest times of my life – it seemed. All I wanted was a friend. I remember the answer coming back to me, I’m not giving you friends, I’m surrounding you with family.
My family is quite the distance from me. My parents live in Florida. I have a sister there now as well. I have a brother who is now closer, down in Southern California. Prayers for his safety amidst these fires! My eldest sister is across the ocean in Japan. Growing up, my siblings and I spent a fair amount of time together. Even into our adulthood, separated by distance but connected by telephone/technology/social media.
Still, there begs the need for relationships. Since I have transitioned, I can truly say that I have found a place where I belong. I have family. Most people do not understand my family – how my ex-husband and his wife, her ex-husband and his wife have become my brothers and sisters. I say it is God. I am moved to tears at times when I realize how blessed I truly am to have such amazing friends – no, family, in my life. I have met so many wonderful people.
It proves to me time and again that God not only answers prayers, but goes above and beyond anything we could imagine when we make a petition. And, it’s not our timing, but His. He is a God of restoration and healing. I didn’t start this year expecting anything. I made no New Year’s Resolutions – I knew I would never keep them. I’m a realist. However, I had within me a hunger to be closer to Christ. My current relationship was good, but it I wasn’t good. Does that make sense?
For me it took BIG FAITH to see BIG CHANGES in my life. I had to wait to move when I wanted to move, but He said Be still. I had to move when He said move – even when I didn’t want to. As a result, I went back to a place I said I would never go. and it has turned out to be home. I suppose I had to be ready?
To look to the Creator rather than the created thing…
I look at how the Lord has blessed me, especially in this year. I have to stop looking at what I am lacking, when I truly have so much. I do this without realizing – it seems. I don’t want to end the year as I started it. I also don’t want to go into a New Year as the same person. As I am always endeavoring to be better than before, I count my blessings and I thank God for His goodness and grace towards me.