I Loved You On Purpose

A couple weeks ago, I watched a movie that I hadn’t seen in quite some time (how many years – I do not know). I’m not sure what made me watch it… The title? I hadn’t even remembered anything about it, I realized as I watched… It felt like the first time I was seeing the movie, in all actuality.

Watching the movie, I was reminded of myself, in a way – through some of the characters. I think I watched the movie through tears, I hadn’t expected a comedy, but I also hadn’t expected so many tears. 

One thing I am grateful for, despite all that I endured in the past, I have learned to live again. Today, I was reminded, I loved you on purpose… Never mind the pain… I loved you on purpose… I no longer feel ashamed for the story I have to tell, knowing I am not the only one. Thankful to God that I did escape with my life – there were too many close calls.

Growing up, my mother used to say that she never worried about me, she knew that I would not allow a man to hit me… I surprised us both. When you love on purpose…

One statement from the video below resonates true for me, I never considered myself a “battered wife.” My husband loved me. He was always apologetic. When he wasn’t putting his hands on me, he treated me like a queen… He too needed me, what a terrible childhood he had endured… The second, well, he had been through so much! I was his lifeline. My whole reason for becoming who I am today, I attribute to him… God bless the suicidal soldiers/veterans…



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