Mom Days

We have sick days, mental health days, my child is sick days… But, can a person stay home for a mom day? Today, I’m in serious need of one.

So far, I’m 2 for 2, praying I don’t strikeout at this mom-thing today.

Being in the car, which thankfully I spend most of my workday, I cried myself to work! I called my dad for advice, hoping he’d make me feel better, he did, but I found myself crying some more. I have come to the conclusion: Being a parent is tough stuff!

This morning, I had to face the reality that my youngest is growing up and testing her wings. Typically, our mornings are ours. Spent inseparable. This morning, she was nowhere to be found. Typically, I walk with her, or drive her to the school bus stop. This morning her friend from down the street came by to pick her up.

I don’t think I let her see me cry. I love you! I said. You too, she replied, driving the knife further into my heart. Can you tell me that you love me too? I still feel bad about that. She sighed heavily and rolled her eyes, before mumbling, Love you too. I suppose I would have done the same.

I disrupted her morning.

But, but – how could this be? I would – I have ditched friends, work, to hang out with my kids, how could they not want to hang out with me? This is my youngest, my baby! No one warns you of these things…

As my dad reminded me, there is a balance of letting go and being there… But, does it really have to begin so soon?

All I wish to do now is take a Mom Day… But, I’m so busy with important things the remainder of the week… I believe it will just have to wait.

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