My, Mine

“My”. “Mine”. No good thing ever comes from an attitude of “My” and/or “Mine”. Ask any mom of toddlers.

I didn’t realize that I had a pretty bad case of the my/mine attitude. But let me tell you, it was bad! Well, to be honest, I’m actually still working on it.

If you’ve read this blog any length of time, you know that I’m a mama to three fantastic kiddos. I love my three, it’s no secret. But, is there such a thing as loving your kids too much? Why, yes, yes there is. I have loved my kids beyond my love for God. In fact, I have loved my kids in such a way that I haven’t trusted anyone, even God, with them. When things have gone awry in their lives, people tell you, surrender them to God. I can surrender everything else, but those kids, I couldn’t – or wouldn’t. Of this I am ashamed.

You see, I hadn’t even realized my folly. But then, there I was thinking about their baby dedications, thinking about Abraham and Isaac, Hannah and Samuel, me and them… What did Hannah and Abraham have in common? Sacrifice. Sure, all three of us – parents. Two, I believe understood the love of God and His love for us. They knew that they could entrust their child in God’s hands. I’m just beginning to figure that out. Fifteen years later…

What could have been going through Abraham’s mind as made the journey to Mt. Moriah with Isaac that day? And what about Hannah, daily, holding that precious baby in her arms, knowing that she would one day take Samuel to Eli?

I guess that’s where trust, faith come in to play.

Sometimes, with the three I’ve been entrusted, all I can see is “my child”. I just want to protect, guard, guide… But life doesn’t quite work like that. I have to trust God that He’s holding them. That He won’t let them fall. I have to release my grip – let go, let God.

Today, I want to be like Hannah and give my kids back to God, as I vowed to do 15, 13, and 11 years ago. I want to be like Abraham and love God wholeheartedly, that I possess nothing. And if there be anything in my heart that threatens to take God’s place, that I lay it down on a sacrificial altar. As much as it may hurt, no matter the cost, because my love for God outweighs my love for anything here in this life.

“Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” Philippians‬ ‭3:13-14‬ ‭KJV‬‬

*Image by KayBee05